IT'S almost scary how today's youth have created an Internet sub-culture so specific to their online habits that those not steeped in it just cannot understand the young's basic communication methods.
Though I spend a considerable amount of time online, I'm constantly discovering how funny this sub-culture can be. I grew up just a few years before the Internet generation really came into being and I'm not really a bona fide Net Native.
I learnt to type on the job as an 18-year-old intern at this very newspaper. I achieved some degree of celebrity status in my university college because I had a green-screen laptop that was really a glorified word processor. And I was one of those who had a digital camera for years but no computer to store the photos on.
In short, I am a Jenny-come-lately to the Internet world. It was my tech-savvy siblings who decided enough was enough and dragged me kicking and screaming into the digital world.
Now, just about four years after buying my first laptop, I'm more likely to ascribe to the philosophy: 'There's no RL, just AFK.'
In Net-speak, RL is short for 'real life', while AFK means 'away from keyboard'. AFK is what you type in chat windows before you pop off to the loo or go get a snack from the kitchen so as to let people know that you're not ignoring them.
Browsing online for Christmas gift ideas, I realised that the Internet sub-culture is more entrenched than I thought. The language and jokes spawned by blogs, social networks and games are ubiquitous in certain quarters of cyberspace - and delightfully so for those in the know.
What I discovered were not necessarily gift ideas, but they were certainly things to share to spread the Yuletide cheer - especially in these cash-strapped and credit-tight times.
One of my favourite discoveries this week was the series of TV commercials promoting the new expansion pack, Wrath Of The Lich King, for the uber-popular multi-player online game World of Warcraft (WoW).
Conceptualised like the minimalist Apple advertisements, it stars various celebrities telling the viewer about his game character. (Or at least, what it would be, since I doubt they actually play.)
These celebrities include William Shatner, dressed inappropriately as a Star Wars Jedi; David Hasselhoff as a very hung-over Level One Drunk Dwarf; and Verne Mini-Me Troyer as a tiny but powerful Gnome Mage.
One of the best advertisements stars Mr T claiming to be a Night Elf Mohawk although there's no such thing. Another is rock star Ozzy Osbourne as an Undead Warlock. He is superimposed onto the game cinematic to face the Prince of Darkness, only to yell: 'Shut up! I've been the Prince of Darkness since 1979!'
Needless to say, I posted it on my Facebook and shared the WoW love around.
Then I found The Guild - an independent sitcom 'webisode' about a group of online gamers - written for gamers by a gamer. Each webisode, available on http://watchtheguild.com, lasts from three to six minutes. Season One has been viewed by at least 10 million viewers worldwide and Season Two's third webisode has just hit MSN Video and Xbox.
You have to be a gamer to get the jokes, obviously. And if you are, the jokes are really quite hilarious. Each character displays different aspects of geek behaviour and the script is peppered with game-speak.
For example, when the husband of a mother- of-three accidentally lets their babies out of the playpen and they start tangling her wires and unplugging her Internet connection, she wails about missing the deadline for a weapon auction because she has been 'mobbed' by 'baby DPS'. Mobbed is a term used when you're suddenly attacked by a group of monsters; and DPS or 'damage per second' refers to players whose primary role in a group is to deal damage while others heal or take hits.
Away from online games, there were lots of funnies I found online while surfing for possible gifts for my family. In line with my self-imposed austerity drive, I thought I might buy them all T-shirts and so I went over to http://thinkgeek.com
For my celebrity blogger sister, there was a baby tee that said: 'I'm blogging this' - a warning to blog-shy folk who might not want their stories or photos appearing on her website. For my PC-hacker-programmer brother, I was undecided between one that said, 'No, I will not fix your computer', and another that proclaimed: 'There are two types of people in the world: Those who understand binary and those who don't.'
For my former-Sportsman-of-the-Year brother- in-law, there was a golf shirt with a classy, discreet power button symbol on the pocket. And for the fellow-gamer boyfriend, there was one that said: 'Die, n00b!' which is what veterans say before killing newbies to teach them a lesson.
For me? I wanted a baby tee that had the Apple iPhone pictorial 'Slide to unlock'. Alas, thinkgeek. com doesn't accept international credit cards and I didn't really want to go through SingPost's vConcierge just to order T-shirts.
Meanwhile, if all you want is to send Christmas cards and not resort to the lame snowflakes-falling- on-a-winter-scene e-cards, you can always hop on over to http://jibjab.com and Elf Yourself.
Basically, you choose the number of wishers you want to include (your entire family for instance), upload photo headshots (the funnier the expression, the better) and let the card generator do the rest. Your heads will be superimposed on the bodies of Santa's elves gyrating like John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever - complete with falling snowflakes, just for tradition's sake.
The humour must be alien to those who've never really spent time online for anything but e-mail, but it's also heartening for parents to know that most online interaction is healthy and not necessarily porn-related.
To those who think they'll never understand their kids, the solution is easy. Just plug in and play.
joannel@sph.com.sg
This story was first published in The Straits Times on 13 December 2008.
